Sew Thus is Life...

So I love reading Humans of New York Posts. This one floated across my timeline a while back and had me shook. It was basically my maternity leave. There are several beautiful Black Queens that I'm "framily" with who are all getting ready to bring their beautiful melanated princesses and princes into the world. A few others have newborns very well experiencing the Fourth Trimester . My advice to you: don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it. So, I'm a Type AB person with high functioning anxiety. Basically, a hot mess, but I make it look good. And that's how I existed for nine months of pregnancy, and three months postpartum. Inside I was a wreck, a tumultuous ball of shot nerves, worry, guilt, breastmilk and caffeine. I would literally stay up all day till 5 am watching "I Love Lucy", hovering over my daughters Rock n Play, W A I T I N G for her to stir, or cry, or pee; or mad that my husband's useless nipple self was upstairs enjoyin...

Today is Sept 27, 2018. A year ago today I was off from work, attending what was supposed to be a routine 37 wk prenatal visit. A year ago today I thought everything was going pretty well. I was still keeping up at work, I had just done the St. Jude Walk, baby shower had been a huge success, and I has big plans to throw myself in full nesting mode the next week. I felt great, heartburn aside. A year ago today I got a phone call from one of my attending OBGYN's to report back to Holy Cross Hospital, and go straight to labor and delivery. I was getting induced in less than 48 hours. How did this happen? Let's back up two weeks prior. After getting the phone call At 35  weeks my OB's recommended that I get an ultrasound with the Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist downstairs. At this point, don't get me lying why I had been recommended. Nuggets heart rate was fine, my blood pressure was healthy and low, as it had been my whole pregnancy. Maybe it was because my...

Where to Find Help and Support Groups like La Leche League and Breastfeeding USA would be a great place to start (I personally belong to their online groups) but in person the groups tend to cater to the typical white, stay at home mom( I'm usually the only Black mom), and I've yet to find a space that uniquely identifies the challenges of the Black community ( edited to add : I DID learn of 2 such groups, but I've yet to be able to make a meeting, one in DC and one in PG. Info below ). My greatest connections have come from my online Black moms groups, specifically Breastfeeding Support for Black Mom s, the private support network of the Black Women Do Breastfeed campaign. Had it not been for those ladies, I too might have fallen for one of the myths that's killed so many breastfeeding relationships. But here is a non-comprehensive list of resources both in and near Prince Georges County, Maryland that cater to breastfeeding, baby wearing, and general mom support. So...

Gorgeous Prince Georges. Pretty Girl County. Prince Georges County, Maryland is THE most affluent area of Black Americans in the country. Yes, even over Atlanta. Residents tend to be more educated than their peers overall, and Black women the most educated out of almost anyone. These are facts. Black women in America are also most likely to die in childbirth, and least likely to breastfeed in the immediate aftermath of childbirth. These are also facts, and PG is no different. Compared to Hispanic and non- Hispanic White women in the county, we are essentially dead last in breastfeeding rates within the hospital at 78%, compared to 90.6% and 81.1% respectively, despite giving birth to over HALF of the counties new babies(1). Most could easily blame this on culture, historical hangups over wet nursing and the "mammy" trope, and the rate of public assistance (WIC) giving out free formula. But with not much searching you'll find that if you wanted to be a breastfeeding m...

HuffPost Not the Tru Moo or Cloverfield Farms kind. I mean the Black mommies breastfeeding their babies and toddlers in Prince Georges County, Maryland. My Story This is long. Bear with me. When I gave birth to Nugget 8.5 months ago, I knew I wanted to breastfeed. But that's all I knew. Due to me giving birth 3 weeks earlier than planned, I didn't get to finish my birth and breastfeeding class. After almost 2 days of nursing in the hospital (which went fine for HER , we had no jaundice, moved all her meconium, only lost 5 ounces), my nipples were completely raw, cracked, and one side even bleeding. Hubs wanted me to "rest" myself and give formula, but breastfeeding was do or die for me. I did not want my child drinking formula, it was kinda the one thing I refused to budge on as a mommy. [ DISCLAIMER : I am not judging any mother who chooses to formula feed, or combination feed, but these are my personal convictions. There was no medical reason for me to no...

Authors Note : I wrote this post over a week ago. I sat on it, started writing a completely different and unrelated post because I initially felt this was just too silly and nobody would take me seriously, or worse yet, further agree that my feelings were ridiculous and be dismissive. However after rereading my own words I felt a therapeutic release to get my feelings and thoughts out to the world (and I'm sure my therapist would agree.) There is absolutely another mom out there who thinks like I did, a simple Google search of "my baby is ____ months old and still not____" or "my baby is doing xyz, is this normal?" shows this. We all want the best for our babies, and I want moms to know that  YOUR BABY IS FINE, 99% of the time. If you have serious concerns that something IS NOT right with your baby, or they are not meeting milestones at all/ well after their peers, please consult your pediatrician or reach out to your state/ county Early Intervention Progra...

So as promised in my intro post, lets discuss two things I'm passionate about: dresses and breastfeeding. These two things could harmoniously coexist, but typically they don't. If you need to nurse, you need direct access to the boobs, so a tailored, fitted dress doesn't meet those requirements. Guess what I wasn't thinking about pre- pregnancy. As such, my wardrobe is limited to what I can wear for more formal occasions and to church, without getting half nekkid in the process. I pretty much wear loose blouses and skirts, low necklines with a tank, or wrap dresses (more on that later). And it never fails that Nugget thinks sermon time is a perfect time to eat. So I had been contemplating what I wanted to make for Mothers Day, being that I had been dying to use this vibrant wax print cotton I had bought last year. Every project I had considered I kept putting on the back burner, and I was getting fed up with myself. I had a little time to kill waiting for material...